Bills

WHEREAS Mark A. Pendl (ZPT-Maricopa) has called for the following amendment to the 1997 Organic Law:
WHEREAS there are no provisions for by-elections in the 1997 Organic Law, Article VI Section 2 shall read: "The Cosa shall be the sole body elected by the whole of the nation. It shall be elected by universal ballot after each dissolution." The words, "...or in by-elections" shall be removed.
And WHEREAS the only way this can be accomplished is by a national referendum;
THEREFORE the Ziu authorises a national referendum on the amendment proposed by Mark A. Pendl, which will coincide with the next General Elections.

By the passing of this act, the Ziu requires the Immigration Minister to include the addresses, postal and/or electronic mail (as relevant) of each of the Talossan political parties that have registered in the previous election to incoming citizens and applicants. The list of addresses shall be unbiased and in alphabetical order, and shall include only one relevant address, by default the electronic mail address, or the postal address if an electronic mail address is unavailable. Furthermore, the list shall be included in a single location in the Ár Päts! text (for example, inside the front cover) when delivered to Talossan citizenship applicants. If the recipient of Ár Päts! is not a Talossan citizenship applicant, no such addresses will be included.

WHEREAS, it has been a tradition for several years for Talossans in Talossa to gather to watch the unspeakably awful monster flick Manos: The Hands of Fate (at least in its vastly improved MST3K version); and
WHEREAS, Mystery Science Theatre 3000 is already the official television programme of the Kingdom of Talossa; and
WHEREAS, public recognition of these facts should impel Talossans around the world to watch Manos: The Hands of Fate as another of those intensely painful sacrifices which they should constantly make for Talossa;
THEREFORE, the Ziu hereby resoundingly designates Manos: The Hands of Fate the Official Motion Picture of the Kingdom of Talossa.

WHEREAS, no nation on earth allows its own citizens to be "Dual Citizens" without some special legal dispensation; and
WHEREAS, citizenship in Talossa and friendship with non-Talossans are completely different matters, and one's true friends will obviously understand why Talossan citizenship is incompatible with activity in a friend's micronation; and
WHEREAS, because of Talossa's small population, it makes an enormous difference if even a handful of individuals are somehow loyal to foreign (and potentially hostile) heads of state;
THEREFORE, the Ziu hereby proclaims that Talossan citizenship is incompatible with any real or pretended citizenship in any "micronation."
Exception 1: such one-person, no-other-citizens-but-me imaginary places that individual Talossans may create as diversionary experiments, and which do not allow the recruiting of citizens for themselves.
Exception 2: The Ziu may make special individual exceptions to this Act, by law.
Violations of this Act are considered to be treason, and the Uppermost Cort is empowered to enforce this Act accordingly.

WHEREAS, from 1991 until 1996 Gloria Estefan was Talossa's officially-recognized "National Entertainer;" and
WHEREAS, this period covered some one-third of Talossa's history as a democracy; and
WHEREAS, despite efforts to stamp them out, there continue to be jokes, comments, guffaws, criticisms, lusts, and a variety of other public and private reactions among Talossans to the continuing, neverending issue of Gloria Estefan--thus proving that in whatever bizarre and unspeakable way, Gloria has become a very real (whether worshipped, appreciated, or despised) part of that decades-old bouillabaisse of Taco Bell-like absurdities which has come to be called "Talossa's national culture";
THEREFORE, the Ziu hereby, whether in pride, shame, amusement or indifference, bows to the inevitable and restores Gloria Estefan to her historic place as Talossa's National Entertainer, in the interest of honouring Talossa as Talossa is, not necessarily as we would force Talossa to be.

WHEREAS, Johan Anglemark of Uppsala, Sweden, has been formally approved by the Talossan Uppermost Cort for a vote by the full Ziu upon his prospective Citizenship in Talossa, the Ziu hereby, meeting in joint Gruppengloppen, solemnly (but not too solemnly) approves the Citizenship of Johan Anglemark.

WHEREAS most public services and facilities (mainly in the areas of health, education, safety, and culture) in Talossan territory are already controlled by the government of the United States of America; and
WHEREAS the Kingdom of Talossa does not have the funds to replace these services by Talossan-controlled ones;
THEREFORE, the Ziu recognizes, approves, and supports this aid from the United States government. In exchange for these sevices, Talossa will transfer the right of collecting taxes from Talossa's Cestoûr subjects and non-Cestoûr citizens living in the Kingdom's territory to the United States of America.

WHEREAS, the Organic Law specifies that one must either vote 'yes' or 'no' on the Vote of Confidence, so one can not abstain from the Vote of Confidence; and
WHEREAS, this has not been the case of many MC's in our Kingdom's history, who, despite the law, have abstained; and
WHEREAS, these abstentions are counted as 'invalid votes' and not considered, thus exemplifying an abstention; and
WHEREAS, we can not allow such mockery of the Organic Law;
THEREFORE, The Secretary of State will punish all Members of the Cosâ who cast invalid votes in the Vote of Confidence; the punishment being the declaration of said member's votes in the same Clark as null and void.

WHEREAS, Talossa is surrounded by the big, friendly state of Wisconsin; and
WHEREAS Wisconsin is home to Green Bay; and
WHEREAS Green Bay is the home of the NFL's best all-around American Football team, the Packers;
THEREFORE Talossa hereby officially adopts the Green Bay Packers as our Official NFL Team, and it will remain so until such time as the RT is able to field its own NFL team to contest the American teams. The Packers are the best team in the NFL both on and off the gridiron, and well deserving the title hereby granted to them.

WHEREAS, Talossa's big, friendly neighboring US state, Wisconsin ("it surrounds us, it penetrates us, it binds us together...") celebrates its sesquicentennial this year; and
WHEREAS it has been kind enough to let us exist unmolested for 19 years;
THEREFORE Talossa hereby congratulates the state on its 150th birthday, and declares May 29th, 1998 to be "Wisconsin Day" in Talossa. (Wisconsin became a state on 5/29/1848.)

To complete the months-old process of establishing guidelines for the placement of future immigrants into Province, and bearing in mind the desire to have equal numbers of people in each province, The Ziu hereby adopts the following:
Those Citizens coming to Talossa and who are resident in the State of Wisconsin shall be divided thusly:

VUODE: The City of Milwaukee.

ATAT

WHEREAS RZ42 of February 1998 will make Brown County, Wisconsin (home of Green Bay) part of the prospective citizen catchment area of Florenciâ Province; and
WHEREAS RZ40 of February 1998 will make the Green Bay Packers the official NFL team of Talossa; and
WHEREAS the world-famous triangular "Cheesehead" hats worn by loyal Packer fans also vaguely resemble the shape of the Province of Florenciâ, so we can concede that this is truly a "sign";
THEREFORE, if RZ40 and RZ42, both of February 1998, both pass, the Ziu officially authorises loyal Talossan citizens to refer to the team heretofore known as the "Green Bay Packers" as the "Florenciâ Packers", in honour of their special status as official NFL team of Talossa.

WHEREAS RZ35 of February 1998 says that all dual citizenships must be registered with the Ziu; and
WHEREAS that same bill says that a dual citizenship without such recognition be counted as treason; and
WHEREAS there is, unfortunately, no provision for the "grandfathering" in of current dual citizens; and
WHEREAS Charles Sauls is currently a dual citizen of Talossa and Penguinea, thus putting him in violation of said proposed act; and
WHEREAS Talossa, whether enthusiastically or begrudgingly, recognises that the presence of said Sauls in Penguinea does lead to a much lower incidence of anti-Talossanism from said quarter;
THEREFORE the Ziu, in solemn and confidential Gruppengloppen (in the same manner as a vote on a regular Talossan citizenship), does approve of the dual citizenship of Charles Sauls in Talossa and Penguinea.

WHEREAS it is often said in English-speaking countries that if a person is angry at another person, he is reading said other person "the Riot Act"; and
WHEREAS due to the unfortunate delay of Project Clark, we do not know if there is indeed a Riot Act to be read by angry persons in Talossa;
THEREFORE the Ziu fulfills its solemn duty to the people by ratifying this, the Riot Act, and authorising it to be read at any time when a Talossan or Cestoûr is peeved at any other Talossan or Cestoûr.

WHEREAS, Steven Ehrbar of Troy, Michigan, has been formally approved by the Talossan Uppermost Cort for a vote by the full Ziu upon his prospective Citizenship in Talossa, the Ziu hereby, meeting in joint Gruppengloppen, solemnly (but not too solemnly) approves the Citizenship of Steven Ehrbar (and may or may not beg him to sit on the Uppermost Cort one day. :-)

WHEREAS, traitor Evan Gallagher as part of an attempt to muck up the provincial system upon which Talossa is based, arranged for the following language to be included in the 1997 Organic Law which he co-wrote:
Article 4, Sec. 8. For the purpose of elections to places in the Senäts, Territories shall be assigned to be part of the Province from which they originated, or if a Territory cannot be so assigned it shall be assigned to a Province by the Ziu. The Territory of Pengöpäts shall be assigned to be part of Cézembre for this purpose.
and WHEREAS, this language allows Territories to have a say in the affairs of Provinces but not vice versa--effectively making territories more powerful than provinces (!), THEREFORE, the Ziu hereby authorizes a national referendum to amend Article 4, Section 8 of the Organic Law to read as follows:
Article 4, Sec. 8. Territories shall have no representation in the Senäts.

WHEREAS, the Organic Law as presently constituted permits Talossans living outside Talossa to freely "move" from province to province with the consent of the provincial governments, while restricting Talossans living inside Talossa to citizenship only in the province in which they physically reside; and
WHEREAS, the Houses of the Ziu recently passed, by overwhelming majorities, the "People To Provinces" act which assigns Talossans living outside Talossa to specific Provinces based solely on geographical criteria; and
WHEREAS, this assignment of citizens to provinces based on geographical criteria seems to be overwhelmingly popular;
THEREFORE, the Ziu hereby authorizes a nationwide referendum to amend Article 16, Sections 2 and 3 to read as follows: (NOTE: text in bold face is new; other text is unchanged)
Article 16, Sec. 2. All Talossan citizens shall belong to the Province in which they live. Citizens living outside of Talossa are assigned to a Province by the Ziu at the time of their naturalization by the Ziu, in accordance with a People to Provinces Act assigning people to provinces based on geographical criteria with all persons in a specific geographic area being assigned to the same corresponding Talossan province. Any citizen who physically moves to a new Province, or moves to a new geographic area and thereby transfers his provincial assignment, shall not be able to vote in the immediately succeeding election for the Government of the Province, nor shall he be eligible to participate, as an elector or as a candidate, in the immediately succeeding election for Senator from that province. However, he shall be eligible to stand for election as a Senator from that province in that election if no other qualified citizen is available or willing to do so.
Sec. 3. No person shall have his assignment to a Province altered without his express consent, even if the Ziu shall see fit to redraw the geographic assignment boundaries. However, a Talossan living in Talossa shall always be assigned to the province in which he lives, even when provincial borders change and his home is thereby 'reassigned' to a different province.

WHEREAS Chris Gruber is a propective Talossan citizen; and
WHEREAS Chris Gruber is planning to produce a free Talossan cultural magazine; and
WHEREAS this is proscribed by LZ14 of October 1997 without authorisation from the Ziu; and
WHEREAS Talossa always needs more emphasis on its culture;
THEREFORE the Ziu gives Chris permission to publish his magazine, Vénéneux.

WHEREAS, Talossa needs its very own Radio Personality (tm) to provide us with unending posts and possible publicity; and
WHEREAS, Chris Gruber fits this bill and actually killed off an entire micronation just to join us (even if it was his own :-); and
WHEREAS, the Talossan Uppermost Cort has officially approved his Citizenship request;
THEREFORE, the Ziu hereby, in solemn Gruppengloppen, doth approve said Citizenship of said Chris Gruber of Tallahassee (ancient Berber word for "Talossa"), Florida.